The Man That I Am

It has been a minute since I have been on here to share a little something with you all. Just recently during one of my "time outs", I was consumed with the condition of my present mental state. I was resolved to the fact that it is still in "stable condition". I couldn't help but thank God for keeping me in my right mind... taking into consideration so many of the challenges that I have had to face in my years of existence. I recall asking the question to various individuals, "If you could go back to any age in your life, at what age would you return to start your life's journey over?" I've always said that I would go back to the age of 5. I had to backtrack over the years to reach a place in my life that seemed relatively stable, secure, carefree... happy. Admittedly, while going through the collected files of my past, I found myself getting tense with anger, mildly depressed, giddy from the thoughts of sporatic comical flashbacks, and occasionally drenched from the uninvited tears that flooded my face when my mind delved into the most darkest chambers of my past. The more memories I recalled and the effects those exeriences has had on my life, the less I entertained the desire of rewinding my life back to my early childhood years. If I were allowed to change even one element of my past, the outcome of who I am today could very well be dramatically different...for the better or for the worse. Believing fully that each one of us on this planet is here for a greater purpose than just taking up space, I've decided to embrace my past and ALL that is consist of and use it to birth opportunities instead of oppositions.

That being said...I'd now like to share the organized, collected thoughts that emerged from that particular "time out".

Questions, & comments are always wecome.

The man that I am Complex, resilient, simplistic... Multi-dimensional man Only by Divine plan.

Though often misunderstood Like those from the hood I'm caring, I love sharing I turn the other cheek Though the pressures of life are frequently overbearing

Whether the weapon's my tongue Or in the form of a gun I must not go kill At my own free will Just 'cause of another's self-centered passions In my space, spills.

I have got to stand tall Strong, valiant, courageous Bearing it all If the children are to learn What it must take in order not to fall.

Along with the good There's gonna be bad Simple fact, at times I'm gonna get "had". But I won't get derailed Just 'cause others have failed For that's my moment to shine By not letting others define The man, the plan, the character I am. But I'd rather embrace Wholeheartedly my case By keeping a steadfast pace. No, I may not be swift But I shall endure this race.

Without the gossips, the critics, I'd never be strong. I've come to realize that in this world Even they need a place to belong... Even though they may be wrong

Like a diamond in the rough I'm gonna hang tough For only in its due time Can my inner beauty be refined Producing a one of a kind, truly unique design That can only be respected, admired and loved by mankind.

All the hurts, the joys, pleasures and pains At last! has wrought its bountiful gains. For it is in these That compassion grows, kindness bestows Heaven knowns, without these, there would be no heroes.

God, "Thank You, Thank You, Thank You" Thank You for keeping it real Thank You for not changing plans when Your will for me I have appealed Thank You for letting me know that without You, these is nothing to yield No happiness fulfilled, nor broken spirits healed

Without You I could have never endured They say what doesn't kill you, will only leave you cured Well, HERE I AM! Never from your embrace to be lured. So hold me, mold me, if need be, scold me But please, never turn Your back and abhor me 'Cause I've learned that with You, I CAN! I CAN!! YES!, I CAN!!! From whence I came to where I now stand It all because of You I've become THE MAN THAT I AM!

Written By: T. Donovan Simons

(c)2006, Taken from the book "The Inner Voice"